"Did he forget something?" Emalia questioned as she walked to the door. "Who knows," Colin answered quietly. The face at the door was not that of Jessiah, nor of anyone she thought would be seeing. Grobnak looked at her with a sorrow on his face and immediately, her hostility went into overdrive. If it weren't for the spell Jessiah had cast upon her, it would have been inevitable that she would have faced drastic consequences for allowing herself into this mode once more.
Emalia heard Grobnak explaining both he and Nephesh were concerned, continuing to speak even though Colin attempted to stop him.
"Child, I do not mean to cause you stress. I only wish to educate you."
"I need no education. I've had enough of learning the ways all of you people operate."
"Can you not see she doesn't want any additional teaching right now?" Colin added.
"All of us people?" Grobnak echoed with a shake of his head. "Nephesh said you were angry, but I was not aware of the level of your rage."
"Every last one of you - underhanded liars the whole lot."Suprisingly, Grobnak's face changed into a pained expression. "What have I lied about?"
"To take the time to explain it all would be time too long."
"Please - if you feel anger, let it be given source. For every lie I have told, I will slash my own wrist." Grobnak indeed began to make good on his offer. He lifted his arm, holding it against his dagger.
"I've nothing more to say to you, Nephesh, Crimson, or anyone else."
"When I have paid for these lies, I will happily do so. Now this is a matter of honor. I do not lie."
"You'll pay when the RoK smashes your head in, and I will be satisfied." Emalia walked from the door, her eyes set on the couch, and seated herself with her back turned. Colin barred the way, though Grobnak did not attempt to enter. A few words passed between the two before Grobnak, determined to hear his accusations fully, thrust down a dagger into the ground and began to pray. Emalia didn't turn around, even as the sound of the slamming door echoed into the house.
"What in the world is wrong with all these people?" Emalia asked mainly of herself. "I mean, am I not supposed to be upset by all the "lack" of telling me things? I get the back of grandfather turned on me, I get spies and cronies to follow me... All for what?"
"It's ok, try not to worry about it too much. I hate to see you getting so upset."
"I don't even know what to do anymore." Emalia turned to Colin for a moment, leaning against him in the hopes that somehow, his giant arms would drown out the sound of chanting from beyond her front door.
"I don't know either. At this point I would just love to get things underway. At the least to just get away from here so we can have a bit of peace."
Emalia felt much the same. She rose quickly from Colin's embrace and grabbed the tablet from the shelf, stuffing it into her already full pack. She had convinced herself that they could walk past Grobnak, get on their horses, and ride past him without a worry. As soon as the door opened, however, the chanting ceased. "I seek only conversation. What is the harm in speaking like civil folk? You call me a liar. You impune my honor. Have I no right to know what I am accused of? Or to defend myself against that claim?"
"All of that will not matter soon enough. If anyone, you should see that."
Emalia walked past Grobnak, followed by Colin. She hadn't turned around when she heard Grobnak directing words to one she knew wasn't she. "Faithless, whatever it is that you are! BELIEVE in something! Lest you find yourself at the Wall."
She turned, knowing what had happened before with Colin and Grobnak. She wouldn't have the only person left to her be killed or slain. "You leave him alone!" she shouted. "You will not speak to me. Why should I not give him warning? If what you still seek to do comes to pass, will he not also suffer?"
Emalia watched Colin pass Grobnak by with a mere roll of his eyes. He went to the horses while Emalia glared at Grobnak. "I'm telling you to leave him alone."
"Am I wrong? Am I lying to you now, Emalia?"
Emalia's body began to shift. The anger she felt was being slowly supplanted by the calm. She knew this sensation well, and the drain it had on her. Without knowing how to control it completely, nor how to stop it, she began flooding the area around her with a distinct feeling of neutrality - not at all helping her. "I don't care! You don't need to bother bringing him into this! He's the only one that has honestly wanted to just help ME."
Emalia couldn't help the tiny tremors that began to work their way into her. After several days of this and the several major stresses that came her way, she was ill prepared to handle yet another release of her energy. Her lifeforce was expanding all around her, and as she and Grobnak argued, she desperately attempted to reign it in, to form it, to contain it. Colin stepped before her, trying to calm her, while Grobnak stood back with tears openly in his eyes, slashing his arm.
Colin turned away, sword drawn, and walked to Grobnak. With the latter refusing to leave, Colin lifted him with ease by the collar, yanking him to his feet. "Are you deaf?" Colin snarled.
"Colin... no!" Emalia heard nothing more as she began to move forward, her lifeforce seeming to weigh her down as she moved. Her body was stiff, her movements forced. Each step drained her more, but she was not going to let anything happen to Colin. At last she reached the two, and wrapped her hand around Grobnak's wound.
The shield around her instantly flowed inward, then out into Grobnak's body. As though a dam had been opened, the flood of healing and life rushed through her hand and into Grobnak. Her thoughts were for the moment, fixated on the fact that she was losing herself in this moment. The release was sweet, but to let completely go, could kill her.
As she slowed the raw power, there were instantly things she noticed. Things within Grobnak that she had no prior knowledge of. In his lifeforce were things she could only describe as dark pits, blackness of an unnatural sort. Not quite dead, not alive, she could tell these pits were consumptive - and within Grobnak, they were freely floating, slowly breeding, combining with him to become him... and he they.
All of this took place in a matter of seconds, the obvious pain on Grobnak's face, the release of his arm by Emalia, Grobnak slumping to the ground unconscious, and Emalia staggering back - breathless herself as she attempted to comprehend what she had just "seen."
Colin dropped his sword, gripping Emalia by the shoulders. "Are you alright?"
"Oh.. oh my... m... Colin he..." Emalia tried to speak, but it only came out in sputtering whispers.
"What Emalia, what is it?"
" I... I don't know... I don't know... I don't know..."
Emalia could barely move as Colin scooped her up into his arms. "Why do people always have to do this to you?" he whispered.
"We... we have... have to help him... put him... somewhere..." Emalia said, ignoring Colin's question.
"Wait, what?" Colin sighed. "Fine, let me take you to bed and I will return him to his compound."
Emalia, taking stock of her own well being, then took in a breath. She could feel Brin's lifeforce inside of her, this time, rather than bowing to the pressures, the tiny force flickered like a candle flame. There was no pain needed to tell Emalia she was in danger of losing her child, and that without the deep rest from complete release, it might happen soon. She told Colin, assuring him that Grobnak was not at fault, and then let the darkness of unconsciousness envelop her completely.
Unexpected Visitor (1-2)
Shock was the frame of mind Emalia found herself in when she heard the knock upon her door. She expected none, and indeed, didn't believe anyone she had recently turned away with her vicious verbal attacks would be bothing to come visiting. She opened her door to find a Guardian standing there. She remembered him from Colin's interview, barely recalled his name, and really had no idea why he was there or how he had gotten there. "Sir... Jessiah?"
Indeed, it was he. She looked him over for a moment, noting just how young he appeared, before allowing him inside. Colin had come from the upstairs with his pack in hand, noting also the visitor. He set his pack onto the floor and the trio began with a bit of small talk. The happiness at having Colin involved with the Guardians, the lack of both Emalia and Colin in the halls as of late (easily explained, Emalia felt), and the checking up on the "health" of their relationship.
The discussion shifted and the already on guard Emalia found herself growing more frustrated by the moment. "If I may be so bold, was there any particular reason for your decision to leave? Because I would very much like to help, if I can, of course, the business of any family member, is consequently my own personal business as well..."
"Unless you're willing to tell everyone in Crimson that bringing down the RoK is a good idea and is not evil, just like the Apprentice is not evil, then you will have solved the problem. And, Sir Jessiah, as I am no longer crimson and even grandfa... Sir Jayden has turned his back upon me... I feel I am no longer of your family, or your concern."
The familiar hand of Colin rested upon Emalia's leg, a reminder for her to take a moment simply to breathe. She readily gave in, taking a long breath which only served to keep her ire from rising for a moment. "Just because you do not currently wear the insignia of the Crimson Guardians, does not mean that you are any less a member of the family," Jessiah said.
"I believe we differ on that point now."
"A Guardian, is more than a mere symbol. Do you believe that you have not the Guardian spirit, or the makings and will to be a Guardian?"
Emalia felt her anger welling once again. She kept her mouth closed and silent, tensing and relaxing her jaw muscles as she stared at the white-eyed man with little less than hot contempt.
"Colin... do you believe Emalia has the spirit of a Guardian, and a doer of good?" Jessiah's attention now on Colin, Emalia turned her eyes upon Colin as well. The audacity of Jessiah to undermine her choice by asking Colin what he thought, as though he could do anything in order to stop her. Emalia's eyes darkened, almost challenging Colin to dare answer.
"I know Emalia will go to any lengths to do that whish she feels is right."
"Ahh.. and THAT is the very essence of being a Guardian..."
"Well," Emalia cut in. "Jayden seems to disagree with you."
"No one person can ever know for sure what is right or wrong. Not even Sir Jayden," Jessiah answered. "I've known Sir Jayden for a long time, and though we do not always agree on everything, we maintain great respect for each other, and I greatly value his wisdom."
"Then you should make haste to exit just as he did," Emalia demanded. She rose from the couch, her anger very near boiling from her. Both Jessiah and Colin requested her to simply sit and listen, and it was all she could do to make herself sit once more. Jessiah had only asked for Emalia to listen, and even while Colin attempted to defuse the situation, Emalia felt compelled to let the brunt of her feelings be known. "If you've come to preach to me about what a Guardian is, I no longer care. I don't care what a Jihadian is. I don't care about a wide variety of things. All I care about is setting in motion the means to end this miserable, backstabbing, lying population that runs rampant in the realms. To reset balance and restore the natural order of things."
"I mean not to preach or upset you, Emalia... nor do I wish to comdemn you, or even judge your beliefs. It is not my place."
"If you are not here for those things, I'd appreciate knowing why you are here."
Again Jessiah began requesting of Emalia the reasons for her leaving the Guardians. Things, Emalia felt, were of no consequence. These things were mere trivialities in her mind, things that in the grand scheme of things, were only taking up her time. Time better spent traveling to the place that would bring about the end of these kinds of problems. Jessiah, it seemed, had other ideas upon just how simple the matter was. "It is normal to feel betrayed, when someone you respect and hold so dear turns their back on you."
"If you believe Sir Jayden is the only reason for my ire, you are sadly mistaken. Even the whole of the Crimson family is not the cause for this."
"But Emalia... have you ever given thought to the possibility that you might have done so first?"
If any worse words could ever have been spoken to Emalia, there could have been few to compare. The colors of the room flashed with a new vividness as Emalia stood on her feet. Were she a bull, she would have trampled Jessiah where he sat. "You come into my home and ask me to look at myself as the problem???"
Pain suddenly came upon Emalia's abdomen. She knew what this was, but she would hide it from Colin, and from her guest. In the turmoil of the past several days, Brin had been alright... but at this continued onslaught of stress, Brin's lifeforce also suffered. Emalia's very own body begged her to relent, and narrowly did she bother to obey.
The discussion continued with far less animosity and rage, Emalia the whole while disguising as best she could the pains within her. The longer she sat, the less it hurt. Eventually she sat with a tablet in her hands. Jessiah then said something that struck her beyond all else that he had said and she had either ignored of dismissed, "I only wish you to consider with yourself.. if it is fair to bestow a force of such great magnitude, upon innocent people, and dictate a fate upon them, in which they have no power."
Jessiah cast a spell upon Emalia, easing the pains within her and making it easier for her to relax, before he himself left. Her mind spun his words around. It was true, she was doing to everyone in the realms what she felt had been done to her. Deciding for all of them what was going to happen. She looked at the tablet for a long moment, exhaustion weighing heavily upon her now. She slid the tablet on the shelf, set to read it later, after a bit of rest, when another knock happened upon her door.
Indeed, it was he. She looked him over for a moment, noting just how young he appeared, before allowing him inside. Colin had come from the upstairs with his pack in hand, noting also the visitor. He set his pack onto the floor and the trio began with a bit of small talk. The happiness at having Colin involved with the Guardians, the lack of both Emalia and Colin in the halls as of late (easily explained, Emalia felt), and the checking up on the "health" of their relationship.
The discussion shifted and the already on guard Emalia found herself growing more frustrated by the moment. "If I may be so bold, was there any particular reason for your decision to leave? Because I would very much like to help, if I can, of course, the business of any family member, is consequently my own personal business as well..."
"Unless you're willing to tell everyone in Crimson that bringing down the RoK is a good idea and is not evil, just like the Apprentice is not evil, then you will have solved the problem. And, Sir Jessiah, as I am no longer crimson and even grandfa... Sir Jayden has turned his back upon me... I feel I am no longer of your family, or your concern."
The familiar hand of Colin rested upon Emalia's leg, a reminder for her to take a moment simply to breathe. She readily gave in, taking a long breath which only served to keep her ire from rising for a moment. "Just because you do not currently wear the insignia of the Crimson Guardians, does not mean that you are any less a member of the family," Jessiah said.
"I believe we differ on that point now."
"A Guardian, is more than a mere symbol. Do you believe that you have not the Guardian spirit, or the makings and will to be a Guardian?"
Emalia felt her anger welling once again. She kept her mouth closed and silent, tensing and relaxing her jaw muscles as she stared at the white-eyed man with little less than hot contempt.
"Colin... do you believe Emalia has the spirit of a Guardian, and a doer of good?" Jessiah's attention now on Colin, Emalia turned her eyes upon Colin as well. The audacity of Jessiah to undermine her choice by asking Colin what he thought, as though he could do anything in order to stop her. Emalia's eyes darkened, almost challenging Colin to dare answer.
"I know Emalia will go to any lengths to do that whish she feels is right."
"Ahh.. and THAT is the very essence of being a Guardian..."
"Well," Emalia cut in. "Jayden seems to disagree with you."
"No one person can ever know for sure what is right or wrong. Not even Sir Jayden," Jessiah answered. "I've known Sir Jayden for a long time, and though we do not always agree on everything, we maintain great respect for each other, and I greatly value his wisdom."
"Then you should make haste to exit just as he did," Emalia demanded. She rose from the couch, her anger very near boiling from her. Both Jessiah and Colin requested her to simply sit and listen, and it was all she could do to make herself sit once more. Jessiah had only asked for Emalia to listen, and even while Colin attempted to defuse the situation, Emalia felt compelled to let the brunt of her feelings be known. "If you've come to preach to me about what a Guardian is, I no longer care. I don't care what a Jihadian is. I don't care about a wide variety of things. All I care about is setting in motion the means to end this miserable, backstabbing, lying population that runs rampant in the realms. To reset balance and restore the natural order of things."
"I mean not to preach or upset you, Emalia... nor do I wish to comdemn you, or even judge your beliefs. It is not my place."
"If you are not here for those things, I'd appreciate knowing why you are here."
Again Jessiah began requesting of Emalia the reasons for her leaving the Guardians. Things, Emalia felt, were of no consequence. These things were mere trivialities in her mind, things that in the grand scheme of things, were only taking up her time. Time better spent traveling to the place that would bring about the end of these kinds of problems. Jessiah, it seemed, had other ideas upon just how simple the matter was. "It is normal to feel betrayed, when someone you respect and hold so dear turns their back on you."
"If you believe Sir Jayden is the only reason for my ire, you are sadly mistaken. Even the whole of the Crimson family is not the cause for this."
"But Emalia... have you ever given thought to the possibility that you might have done so first?"
If any worse words could ever have been spoken to Emalia, there could have been few to compare. The colors of the room flashed with a new vividness as Emalia stood on her feet. Were she a bull, she would have trampled Jessiah where he sat. "You come into my home and ask me to look at myself as the problem???"
Pain suddenly came upon Emalia's abdomen. She knew what this was, but she would hide it from Colin, and from her guest. In the turmoil of the past several days, Brin had been alright... but at this continued onslaught of stress, Brin's lifeforce also suffered. Emalia's very own body begged her to relent, and narrowly did she bother to obey.
The discussion continued with far less animosity and rage, Emalia the whole while disguising as best she could the pains within her. The longer she sat, the less it hurt. Eventually she sat with a tablet in her hands. Jessiah then said something that struck her beyond all else that he had said and she had either ignored of dismissed, "I only wish you to consider with yourself.. if it is fair to bestow a force of such great magnitude, upon innocent people, and dictate a fate upon them, in which they have no power."
Jessiah cast a spell upon Emalia, easing the pains within her and making it easier for her to relax, before he himself left. Her mind spun his words around. It was true, she was doing to everyone in the realms what she felt had been done to her. Deciding for all of them what was going to happen. She looked at the tablet for a long moment, exhaustion weighing heavily upon her now. She slid the tablet on the shelf, set to read it later, after a bit of rest, when another knock happened upon her door.
The Past (1-2)
The sensation of light broke Emalia's sleep, and her eyes fluttered open to the breaking of the dawn. Again, she would neglect sending a prayer to the Morning Lord, though such duties were far from her mind. She rolled over, nudging Colin awake. The idea of getting underway sent jolts of electricity through her, and she practically leapt from the bed. "You sure you don't want just a couple more hours to sleep?" Colin asked, returning to the sanctity of the quilts.
"I'm positive. As soon as I gather some clothes, I'm leaving. As are you, I assume. Once upon a time you didn't even sleep."
"I know, I almost forgot what I was missing."
Emalia paused in her packing. "You know... I've never stopped to ask you about that. Who were you before... well, before you died."
"Just me," Colin shrugged.
"You didn't have a name? Things you liked to do?"
"Well, I spent all my time in a quest for knowledge, power. In the end it wasn't a very happy existence."
"So how did it happen... you dying that is." Emalia moved to the bed, sitting near Colin as she looked over to him.
"It was so long ago, sometimes I feel like I can barely remember it," Colin answered with a sigh. "A dragon killed me."
"That must have been terrifying."
"Anyway, it was long ago, and I had nothing of what I have now." Colin looked at Emalia with a small smile. "With you I have everything I was missing."
Emalia smiled in return. To be everything that was missing was an honor. She still didn't know how it was that she could be such a thing to anyone, but she wouldn't admit to such an insecurity. The statement turned her thoughts toward her own family. She wouldn't be seeing them again after this, and while she cared for little now, the idea of at least saying goodbye to the Uncle she hadn't seen in ages crossed her mind. "I don't think you've ever met my Uncle Sandorin, have you?"Colin looked on with a blank expression. "You have only introduced me to your father. You were so eager to set off yesterday."
"You'll like him. He's a good man too, though we rarely saw him with his desires to conduct his studies. I suppose he just came into my thoughts... I wouldn't mind saying goodbye to him. I doubt with the way he was he's going to be around after the RoK falls." Emalia looked to Colin, noticing that he had completely turned away from her.
"You either," she added quietly.
"I don't know if this it the time to go about meeting family. Considering the context of this journey."
"Well, this is the only time we're going to have... We're... well... not coming back. And besides it wouldn't be that long."
"You think he will be alright with you going?"
"It doesn't matter. I doubt he would try to stop me."
It seemed odd to Emalia that Colin was attempting to turn her from seeing her family - moreover turning her from something she wanted. "I just think it's best to get things underway, not take the chance of things getting and harder or more complicated then they are already," Colin said. In a way he was right, but the nagging darkness began again. Emalia wasn't about to give up on her right to family - regardless of whether it was a member that she'd not seen since the time she'd just met Colin.
"I don't understand," Emalia said. "Who is to say he won't offer to help... My uncle has never done anything underhanded like those others in any case."
"Does he have the same beliefs as you?"
"No. But neither do you. I guess I just don't understand why you seem so against my talking to my uncle for the last time. I'm never going to see him again, Colin. Everyone else I've at least spoken to in the past, recent. Him... last I spoke to him was when we first met."
Emalia watched as Colin moved from the packing he had begun to sit beside her on the edge of the bed. He bowed his head, staring at his hands. "Emalia, you have never introduced me but I do know of Sandorin, from my previous life. I had no idea he was your uncle, though."
The clenching of Emalia's insides forced her to hunch in the tiniest bit to keep herself in order. "Then there should be no trouble at all."
"We had some differing views though," Colin sighed. "It's complicated and not really something that I would like to rehash."
"What happened with the two of you?"
"I'm not necessarily proud of the person I was. I was quite consumed with the aquisition of power. So was your uncle, to some extent. That is why he came to me, to study under me."
Emalia felt the tremors rising up inside of her. The darkness returned, gripping at her and taunting with the idea that she was about to hear something new. Something different. Something withheld from her. The idea that this was happening, coming from Colin... "Study... but... Uncle Sandorin is a Wizard... not... not a fighter..."
"You forget, I was not always like this. I was once very skilled in magic. Over time, his views changed though and he disagreed with some of the methods and avenues of my studies."
Emalia stared at her lap. For this to be true, something had to be terribly wrong. "What... methods and avenues did you travel? For Uncle Sandorin to refuse study... it..." 'would have to be truly terrible,' her thoughts concluded."I was much different then Emalia. I was consumed with gaining power and knowledge. I didn't shun the ways of death. I was so misguided. My life was so meaningless yet I didn't even know it."
Still, Emalia sat with her innards clenched as if frozen tightly in place. She spoke with her voice barely above a whisper. "Is that how you... came into this body? I... I mean... how... why?"
"That's the irony. It was my mastery of death that allowed me to continue on after my physical demise. And ultimately allowed me to be here."
"Then why can't you do what you used to be able to do?"
"I can't truly explain that. Somewhere in the transition from my previous life I lost my connection to the arcane. But in a way I don't mind. It helps me to focus more on the things that are truly important." Emalia took this moment to continue staring at her hands. Colin continued, "Your Uncle actually helped to make me who I am. Literally. He helped me to make my body."
Could anyone have seen the normally pale woman at that moment doing anything but laying down, they may have wondered how the dead were able to rise. Every ounce of color seemed to have left her, leaving her very light grey. Flashes of heat rose through her and vanished with the presence of the opposite chill that drove in after. She could think of nothing to say, her thoughts were choked in the bottleneck of news. Her Uncle Sandorin had never told her anything of his studies. She knew only that her mother felt they were dangerous. She didn't know who he studied under, she didn't know why, she didn't know how long... but apparently, the being her mother felt was dangerous was the very one sitting beside her in a body constructed by his pupil who happened to be her Uncle-
Emalia rose from the bed amidst Colin's apologies. No, she would think nothing on this. Colin was Colin and - yes - he was Colin. Nothing had changed. No, her world wasn't falling down... only the RoK would once she reached it. Nothing had changed. She walked from the room, carrying her bag with her in order to load their horses, leaving a somewhat subdued Colin to finish his packing.
"I'm positive. As soon as I gather some clothes, I'm leaving. As are you, I assume. Once upon a time you didn't even sleep."
"I know, I almost forgot what I was missing."
Emalia paused in her packing. "You know... I've never stopped to ask you about that. Who were you before... well, before you died."
"Just me," Colin shrugged.
"You didn't have a name? Things you liked to do?"
"Well, I spent all my time in a quest for knowledge, power. In the end it wasn't a very happy existence."
"So how did it happen... you dying that is." Emalia moved to the bed, sitting near Colin as she looked over to him.
"It was so long ago, sometimes I feel like I can barely remember it," Colin answered with a sigh. "A dragon killed me."
"That must have been terrifying."
"Anyway, it was long ago, and I had nothing of what I have now." Colin looked at Emalia with a small smile. "With you I have everything I was missing."
Emalia smiled in return. To be everything that was missing was an honor. She still didn't know how it was that she could be such a thing to anyone, but she wouldn't admit to such an insecurity. The statement turned her thoughts toward her own family. She wouldn't be seeing them again after this, and while she cared for little now, the idea of at least saying goodbye to the Uncle she hadn't seen in ages crossed her mind. "I don't think you've ever met my Uncle Sandorin, have you?"Colin looked on with a blank expression. "You have only introduced me to your father. You were so eager to set off yesterday."
"You'll like him. He's a good man too, though we rarely saw him with his desires to conduct his studies. I suppose he just came into my thoughts... I wouldn't mind saying goodbye to him. I doubt with the way he was he's going to be around after the RoK falls." Emalia looked to Colin, noticing that he had completely turned away from her.
"You either," she added quietly.
"I don't know if this it the time to go about meeting family. Considering the context of this journey."
"Well, this is the only time we're going to have... We're... well... not coming back. And besides it wouldn't be that long."
"You think he will be alright with you going?"
"It doesn't matter. I doubt he would try to stop me."
It seemed odd to Emalia that Colin was attempting to turn her from seeing her family - moreover turning her from something she wanted. "I just think it's best to get things underway, not take the chance of things getting and harder or more complicated then they are already," Colin said. In a way he was right, but the nagging darkness began again. Emalia wasn't about to give up on her right to family - regardless of whether it was a member that she'd not seen since the time she'd just met Colin.
"I don't understand," Emalia said. "Who is to say he won't offer to help... My uncle has never done anything underhanded like those others in any case."
"Does he have the same beliefs as you?"
"No. But neither do you. I guess I just don't understand why you seem so against my talking to my uncle for the last time. I'm never going to see him again, Colin. Everyone else I've at least spoken to in the past, recent. Him... last I spoke to him was when we first met."
Emalia watched as Colin moved from the packing he had begun to sit beside her on the edge of the bed. He bowed his head, staring at his hands. "Emalia, you have never introduced me but I do know of Sandorin, from my previous life. I had no idea he was your uncle, though."
The clenching of Emalia's insides forced her to hunch in the tiniest bit to keep herself in order. "Then there should be no trouble at all."
"We had some differing views though," Colin sighed. "It's complicated and not really something that I would like to rehash."
"What happened with the two of you?"
"I'm not necessarily proud of the person I was. I was quite consumed with the aquisition of power. So was your uncle, to some extent. That is why he came to me, to study under me."
Emalia felt the tremors rising up inside of her. The darkness returned, gripping at her and taunting with the idea that she was about to hear something new. Something different. Something withheld from her. The idea that this was happening, coming from Colin... "Study... but... Uncle Sandorin is a Wizard... not... not a fighter..."
"You forget, I was not always like this. I was once very skilled in magic. Over time, his views changed though and he disagreed with some of the methods and avenues of my studies."
Emalia stared at her lap. For this to be true, something had to be terribly wrong. "What... methods and avenues did you travel? For Uncle Sandorin to refuse study... it..." 'would have to be truly terrible,' her thoughts concluded."I was much different then Emalia. I was consumed with gaining power and knowledge. I didn't shun the ways of death. I was so misguided. My life was so meaningless yet I didn't even know it."
Still, Emalia sat with her innards clenched as if frozen tightly in place. She spoke with her voice barely above a whisper. "Is that how you... came into this body? I... I mean... how... why?"
"That's the irony. It was my mastery of death that allowed me to continue on after my physical demise. And ultimately allowed me to be here."
"Then why can't you do what you used to be able to do?"
"I can't truly explain that. Somewhere in the transition from my previous life I lost my connection to the arcane. But in a way I don't mind. It helps me to focus more on the things that are truly important." Emalia took this moment to continue staring at her hands. Colin continued, "Your Uncle actually helped to make me who I am. Literally. He helped me to make my body."
Could anyone have seen the normally pale woman at that moment doing anything but laying down, they may have wondered how the dead were able to rise. Every ounce of color seemed to have left her, leaving her very light grey. Flashes of heat rose through her and vanished with the presence of the opposite chill that drove in after. She could think of nothing to say, her thoughts were choked in the bottleneck of news. Her Uncle Sandorin had never told her anything of his studies. She knew only that her mother felt they were dangerous. She didn't know who he studied under, she didn't know why, she didn't know how long... but apparently, the being her mother felt was dangerous was the very one sitting beside her in a body constructed by his pupil who happened to be her Uncle-
Emalia rose from the bed amidst Colin's apologies. No, she would think nothing on this. Colin was Colin and - yes - he was Colin. Nothing had changed. No, her world wasn't falling down... only the RoK would once she reached it. Nothing had changed. She walked from the room, carrying her bag with her in order to load their horses, leaving a somewhat subdued Colin to finish his packing.
Well deserved Rest
Emalia laid there for several hours after Nephesh had gone. She had ceased thinking about the RoK, Nephesh, Crimson Guardians, even Colin. She merely lay there thinking of nothing - her mind seemed to have gone into a vacuous state. It was soothing to melt into the blackness of nothing while staring up at the whiteness of the ceiling - it simply offered her a way to be in a state of limbo - wanting for nothing.
"Hey there. How are you feeling?" The sound of Colin's voice brought her back to the present. The two discussed the fresh happenings with Nephesh, and his reason for leaving. Before she could get too worked up, Colin placed his hand on her leg. It felt that more and more, he touched her to bring her back from the brink of the mental blackness that anger sent her to.
"Did you get all the supplies?" she asked finally.
"Yes, I think I have everything we should need. Although if Nephesh isn't coming I have a bit extra, including a pony I guess we won't be needing."'A pony,' Emalia thought. She couldn't believe that Colin had stopped to think of Nephesh. It warmed her heart just a tiny bit. To know Colin was in such disagreement with the boy when they first met, and now he was thinking of him. "Well, I would say bring it just in case, but I suppose that means another mouth to feed."
"I can just return it tomorrow before we set off."
"Tomorrow," Emalia said, looking to Colin. "Oh no, Colin. We must leave now."
"Emalia, no. We need to have a good meal and a good night's sleep before we set off. Especially you."
She could do nothing in way of convincing Colin to leave. For the first time since they had been together, she listened. They talked about Colin's belief system, for, as Grobnak had informed her, his lack of faith was disturbing. Colin could very well miss the rebirth and be forced into a wall for an unknown period of time. Even as Emalia talked to him, she felt the urge to fight. Darkness tugged at the edges of her thoughts and only one thing laid them to rest. "If there's one thing that I DO believe in, Emalia, it's you. I will follow you anywhere."
How anyone could believe in her, when it felt as though the rest of the realms didn't trust her at all, sent her into tears. She was grateful as she laid back on the bed. As Colin walked out to make their dinner, she rolled to her side, drifting in and out of sleep. Only for a moment would she admit that she was truly exhausted.
"Hey there. How are you feeling?" The sound of Colin's voice brought her back to the present. The two discussed the fresh happenings with Nephesh, and his reason for leaving. Before she could get too worked up, Colin placed his hand on her leg. It felt that more and more, he touched her to bring her back from the brink of the mental blackness that anger sent her to.
"Did you get all the supplies?" she asked finally.
"Yes, I think I have everything we should need. Although if Nephesh isn't coming I have a bit extra, including a pony I guess we won't be needing."'A pony,' Emalia thought. She couldn't believe that Colin had stopped to think of Nephesh. It warmed her heart just a tiny bit. To know Colin was in such disagreement with the boy when they first met, and now he was thinking of him. "Well, I would say bring it just in case, but I suppose that means another mouth to feed."
"I can just return it tomorrow before we set off."
"Tomorrow," Emalia said, looking to Colin. "Oh no, Colin. We must leave now."
"Emalia, no. We need to have a good meal and a good night's sleep before we set off. Especially you."
She could do nothing in way of convincing Colin to leave. For the first time since they had been together, she listened. They talked about Colin's belief system, for, as Grobnak had informed her, his lack of faith was disturbing. Colin could very well miss the rebirth and be forced into a wall for an unknown period of time. Even as Emalia talked to him, she felt the urge to fight. Darkness tugged at the edges of her thoughts and only one thing laid them to rest. "If there's one thing that I DO believe in, Emalia, it's you. I will follow you anywhere."
How anyone could believe in her, when it felt as though the rest of the realms didn't trust her at all, sent her into tears. She was grateful as she laid back on the bed. As Colin walked out to make their dinner, she rolled to her side, drifting in and out of sleep. Only for a moment would she admit that she was truly exhausted.
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