The forest sounded with typical life. The trees rustled in the breeze and squirrels chattered and hopped from branch to branch. Sanria stopped and put her hand on the trunk of an old oak. "Dear friend, can you give me a moment of your time?" she asked it.
"A moment? How long is a moment? Seconds? An eternity?" the oak said into her mind, it's voice a deep, ancient baritone.
"A mortal moment."
"You are far from mortal with this elven blood shared, but I will listen."
"Please, if my son asks for me, wondering where I am, will you reply that I am safe?"
"Are you safe?" the tree asked.
"Yes."
"And now, are you safe?" the tree asked.
"I am."
"And now?"
"Why do you persist with this?" Sanria asked.
"Because you cannot see the future. Can you?"
Sanria sighed deeply, her patience being tried. "No."
"Then what shall I tell him?" the tree asked.
"That I took a walk in order to think and clear my mind."
"And to that, I may abide."
"I thank you," Sanria said, removing her hand.
Sanria walked south through the trees, deep within the Haon'Dor. She could feel the farther she walked, the more calm she became. The forest grew cool and quiet, the trees older and larger. Everything here seemed to be a system, and one of which Sanria was a part. The soul of every living thing breathed in concert and her mind could let down its walls.
She sat down beside a very tall poplar and pulled out her book. She ran a hand over the cover with a sigh. It was one of the last things she took from the Illuminati before - she shook her head and opened it. Her handwriting filled the margins of "Ideals behind Balance: A Comprehensive to Discovering a True Path." It was one place she felt she could write and none but herself would find. In these pages were her deepest thoughts and desires, hopes and dreams. Of course, she had read the book a number of times, but its use now was a catalogue of her life. In the middle of the book, she put her pen to page, writing in the spine:
"I lack clarity. How can someone expect to live a balanced life when things continue to spiral out of control? I've hidden in my cavern so long I didn't even notice when the world came crashing down. Let alone my own life."
She turned the page and continued writing:
"Colin killed a woman. He is filled with a substance that I cannot control, and can no longer live with. Yet if I don't reconcile, I feel I'll be smothered. I don't believe he will let me walk away from this."
Sanria sighed deeply and sat for several moments. She could choose to run away, but that simply wasn't her any more. She could think of nothing to do - was there anything to do? Her life seemed a microcosm and within that tiny orb had crept chaos and the pressure to conform, to squash the upset, was intense.
