Claire had seen Gilean exactly twice. The first time, he seemed lost, lonely in some strange way. That first time he questioned her about her relationship with Ruthivan. She'd been guarded. It was none of his business that her husband was controlling and obsessed. The second time she came after mirin told her about the three-way marriage. She came to look at his face because she couldn't fathom him being happy. He was defensive. This time, it was none of her business that he wanted Sanria all to himself but couldn't manage to fight off Colin. Exactly twice. And Ruthivan had been watching.
She came home after her second visit to Gilean and stayed out of sight. She quietly took stock of her life: four children with Ruthivan, a torn out uterus for birth control (Ruthivan felt it their sole duty to repopulate the entire realms to help the esper population rebound), a marriage she loathed, a bond to which she was a slave. She kept memories of Gilean close at hand- happy he'd found happiness, sad it wasn't with her. She pulled herself out of the thought. That time had long passed.
At last, she crept into the bedroom and slipped into bed - hoping Ruthivan had gone to sleep- but the speed with which he turned to face her let Claire know he'd been waiting. His eyes were dark rubies glittering hard. His face was pinched with anger and his voice, even his breath, trembled in rage. 'Where were you today?'
There was no love here. Before, he'd tried at least to teach her to love him. He let her decide on her own whether to stay or go. A very magnanimous gesture... only the already had a bond that linked them and children who needed them. She'd stayed. Slowly, though, his old self had returned. She belonged to him- property. She hadn't noticed how bad things were until they were so far gone she was beyond hope or help. She was neck deep in quicksand and still sinking. Now? She looked at the contorted face and as dispassionately as you please, lied. 'I went to see Mirin and Matinus.'
