It was dread that suddenly washed over Sanria when the glowing eyes settled in the chair across the desk. Fenlauch rarely came for simple chats. His conversations with Sanria were reserved for matters of gravity. And somehow, Sanria knew, this was serious. "Is he okay," she whispered.
"Yes. The proceedure was a success."
"Ah!" Sanria smiled, relieved. "Where is he?"
"That, is why I've come to speak with you."
"I... okay." Sanria settled herself, quelling the fire of excitement that had ignited moments before. "What's happened?"
"We've brought him back and he is staying in Westbridge until his mind is able to heal."
"But, you said it worked..."
"It did, but there were, casualties in his memories."
"Casualties..."
"Think of it like this," Fenlauch said, letting out an exhale. "His mind is full of certain holes, holes that will not fill in, but are currently as soft as a sponge. If he attempts to fill them in now, he could face a collapse. His mind has to... set... if you will."
"Holes..."
"Sanria, when your friend, Throm, placed Colin into the vat of Black Makou, Colin was in stasis, his thoughts on you and his children."
"Yes..."
"His memories of you merged with that substance. That was why you alone could calm him. So when we removed the ichor from him..."
"He forgot me."
Sanria leaned back in her chair. She didn't remember to breathe until her lungs began to burn. Only then did she look up at Fenlauch. "I'm sorry," he said quietly.
"Will he recover, I mean, I know you said holes but..." Fenlauch shook his head slowly. "You must let him mend and perhaps then you can get to know him over again, but no. Your past with him is gone in his mind. You are the holes."
"What... what about his children? Orn... Leandra..."
"He may have vague recollections of them... but not..."
There was nothing she could say. Sanria leaned back in her chair, unable to even see for all the tears clouding her vision. 'At least he's alive, at least he's alive, at least...' but Sanria found herself going numb. She sat up and smoothed her robes. "I'll have to speak to Orn."
"Sanria, perhaps you should take a little time to-"
"And I'll tell Leandra, then I'll get to work on helping Radiant Heart with Westbridge."
"Sanria..."
"Thank you, Fenlauch. Thank you for helping him."
Sanria watched as the huge man rose and bowed slowly. "I believe you should take time to let yourself understand and heal. I will not force you out of here, but be aware that your clan needs you to be strong and coherent."
"I am aware," she whispered.
"If you have any questions, please come to me."
"Thank you."
Without the huge presence in the room, Sanria felt her body crush. She leaned forward, taking in a breath to let out a deep sob, when a bouquet of flowers appeared on her desk with a card written in druid script: "Thanks for earlier. If you're busy and stressed, smell the flowers. Enjoy while they last!"
